Confession: I used to drink 2 bottles of wine a day.
Cringing Confessions from the mind of an Energy Healer; before Energy Healing.
A new blog series about the thoughts of an Energy Healer: before Energy Healing.
I wasn’t raised in a spiritual or new-age household. I was a firm skeptic. This blog series is for people like me.
Whether you are at the start of your healing journey or you’re reflecting on how much you too have changed, I hope this series inspires you in some way.
It can be intimidating to embrace the “weird” world of Energy Healing. Please know that you are not alone. When you’re ready to suspend disbelief and reclaim your emotional freedom, without judgement or difficult conversations, The Introvert Healer is here to help.
Read on or Book Your Distance Energy Healing Session Now.
To your success and happiness,
🌺 Maryann Whitelaw
Certified Energy Healer | Self-development Enthusiast | Introvert (INFJ) | Spiritualist | Heart-Centered Solopreneur
Numbing with alcohol
Alcohol is a common, often socially accepted way to numb our emotions.
While alcohol can temporarily numb our pain and stress, the root causes always remain. In fact, the after effects of drinking often amplify the stress, because now we have to deal with our problems while battling a hangover.
How often have you heard or used the following alcohol related statements?
“I need a drink after the day I’ve had.”
“I can’t socialize / dance / sing / have this conversation sober.”
“It’s five o’clock somewhere!”
My own version of the 5-o’clock rule was “Bottle stores open at 9am… If they’re selling alcohol at this time, I’m allowed drink alcohol at this time!”
Diary of a Binge Drinker
I grew up in an environment where it was common to drink every day. It was perfectly acceptable to drink until passing out. Everyone was allowed to make a fool of themselves and blame the alcohol.
My own self-destructive, unhealthy relationship with alcohol lasted about 20 years - from 16 to 36 years old.
I don’t know if I ever really liked the taste of alcohol.
I would only drink with the intention of getting completely drunk.
When I was 20 years old in South Auckland, New Zealand, after finishing work on Friday I would head to my local bottle shop and get one box of 24 pre-mixed bottles of vodka and lemon soda and one box of 24 pre-mixed bourbon and coke cans.
I would drink every single one of those cans and bottles during the weekend.
When I moved to Australia at 24 years old, I knew that had to change… But only because pre-mixed drinks were so expensive!
My usual weekend order was now triple the price in my new home town of Brisbane. So I switched to wine.
I hated the taste of wine. But it was cheap and achieved all I needed from alcohol: the ability to forget my pain and socialize freely.
Over the next 12 years my alcohol consumption increased and my social anxiety worsened.
I felt like I needed alcohol to feel comfortable around other people. But drinking just lowered my inhibitions. I often spent days, even weeks agonizing over the embarrassing things I had said and done while drinking.
And that made me want to drink more to forget.
Steps to sobriety
At the height of the 2020 lockdowns I was starting each morning with 2 shots of Baileys in my coffee, having at least one glass of vodka and orange juice with lunch, then drinking 2 full bottles of wine once I had logged off from work for the day.
I was miserable, anxious, depressed and incredibly unhealthy.
Left: The selfie of a sad, hungover, binge drinker.
Right: The selfie of healthy, happy, sober woman.
In September 2020 I decided I didn't want to live that way anymore, and I quit alcohol cold turkey.
To give myself the best chance at sticking to my convictions (without having to talk to anyone) I started reading “quit-lit” [such as The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray and Alcohol Lied To Me by Craig Beck] and I joined Facebook groups about sober living.
Judgmental minefield
If you’ve ever joined a Facebook group you know there are a lot of people with A LOT of opinions.
Posts asking for support after relapses were met with shame.
Members took it upon themselves to label others as “alcoholics”.
People sharing recommendations for alcohol-free versions of spirits were called “cheaters”.
This really didn’t resonate with me at all.
I don’t believe anyone has the right to label or judge anyone else. We are all doing the best we can, from our current level of understanding.
Sober-Living, Silver-lining
I didn’t stay in these groups very long but I will admit there was one post which changed my life.
It was within a sober living Facebook group that I first learn about the Emotion Code by Dr Bradley Nelson and started discovering the world of Energy Healing.
The full story is included in my blog post: My Heart-Wall Clearing Experience.
Energy Healing + Self-development have been the keys to my successful sobriety.
Now, almost 3 years later, I have not had a single alcoholic beverage and the cravings are almost non-existent.
Will I stay sober?
I don’t know.
Alcohol is so ingrained in Australian culture. We toast successes and commiserate losses by charging a glass. Fancy meals are often paired with a glass of classy wine to elevate the experience. (Not 2 full bottles of $8 wine to numb the senses. 🙃)
So it’s hard to say definitively if I will be alcohol-free for life.
But if I chose to drink again in the future, I am confident it will be in moderation. I now have the tools I need to maintain control over alcohol.
Where to start
The first step is to decide you’re ready to make a change.
I suggest taking at least an hour alone to think or journal about whether or not your alcohol consumption is negatively affecting your life. Have an honest conversation with yourself.
Is your drinking holding you back?
Does your relationship with alcohol impact your family, your friends, or your job?
How would your life improve without alcohol?
How much time would you be able to invest in a new hobby, sport or relationship if you spent less time drinking and recovering from drinking?
If you are ready to quit - what support system will work best for your personality? Do you prefer one-on-one guidance, group settings or are you a lone-wolf, solo-sober-warrior like me?
Quit-Lit
As I mentioned, my favorite quit-lit titles are The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray and Alcohol Lied To Me by Craig Beck. But there are lots of wonderful books available if you would like to read about other people’s path to sobriety.
Energy Healing
Whether your goal is to quit completely or to limit consumption to weekends through reducing cravings - Energy Healing can help!
I recommend starting by Clearing Your Heart-Wall with my Happy Heart Healing Package.
This 3-week Energy Healing Package is designed to help you:
Release the energetic walls around your heart
Create deeper connections with your friends and loved ones
Experience more joy and love
Feel calmer and more confident everyday
Be open to greater abundance
Develop self-love by removing blocks and improving your self-talk
Feel better physically by creating greater electromagnetic flow from the Heart to your other organs.
Once we release your Heart-Wall, in Week 2 and Week 3 we continue to clear additional energetic protection and coping mechanisms which contribute to self-destructive behaviors.
Some of the common imbalances we can release include:
Seeking Heart Energy - In the presence of a Heart-Wall positive emotions can be blocked and we begin to seek an external substitute. Substitutes can be anything that has the potential to be addictive or lead to destructive behaviours eg sugar, food, drugs, alcohol, tobacco, pornography, work, excess exercise.
Emotional reverberations - An emotional reverberation is a trapped emotion which did not condense into a ball of energy. It can be compared to an emotional ringing in the body. Sometimes it’s subtle, sometimes it’s not. But the emotion is always there, in the background.
Spirit break - We have a dual nature in that we exist in our mortal form with both a physical body and a spirit or energy body. 'Spirit break' almost always affects the energetic version of the heart, as a “broken heart.” This would indicate that the heart was “broken” into 2 or more "pieces", which are now not connected or whole as they should be.
Memory field - A memory field is simply the energy of memories, stored in the energy field, often in front of your eyes. This makes it difficult to be positive about the future because you are looking at it through a filter of a past, hurtful experience.
